Saturday, October 15

I'm an alien: ramblings on a rainy Saturday

Just a reminder that this is where I am geographically. Sometimes I cannot help thinking how little Brazil is known by many and how it hurts to hear "now our jobs are going to Brazil." as if it was an explanation. 
I wonder what do Chinese think when they hear it, and I met Chinese people two years ago that hated the same phrase.
Karoshi is a Japanese word for "death from overwork". I never bought at Wall-Mart and will never do.
Mexicans are also to blame for the job crisis. Work for peanuts is understood as a choice people do: "When I grow up I want to work as a slave. Yippee! Yippee!"
One of the many stories I have was an American that once told me: 
"You know, I was amazed that you said you know James Joyce being a Brazilian."
This man is a writer so he is part of a certain elite. The conversation kept going and I told him how I like Lawrence Sterne's Tristram Shandy, that influenced one of our most important nineteen century writers, and he didn't know Lawrence Sterne.
I also mention a couple of writers from Ireland and England that he also didn't know. But what does this man think that Brazilian cities are?
By looking at the map and considering the area of this country the conclusion is obvious: there is a lot of regional differences and just by taking into consideration the city we are born we know that there are different groups of people according to different criteria I don't want to mention now.
I am getting in touch with many Americans lately because what happens in US affect us all and also because it is easier to talk to some Americans about certain topics that I care. 
I don't know why I started writing this post. It started when I looked at my Facebook account I finally noticed that I have only one Brazilian friend that is a virtual friend I met in 2005.
I started blogging in English about the pharmaceutical industry in 2008 because all my research was in English and only Americans and British people are fighting to raise awareness about the medicine bad practice.
I met amazing people doing a great job.
As it is a very hard topic and many times I got angry or sad because it is very difficult to see not a single change and things getting worse instead I decided to start this blog that was only about art and culture and good things people do in institutions or great initiatives... but all of a sudden I got involved with the US foreign politics and it's capability of spreading horror all over the world, and, now with the movement Occupy Wall Street.
Sometimes I feel like an alien at the internet and I blame it on my citizenship: "Ana, that Brazilian?" is how I'm remembered.
Funny because when you are living in another country as I lived in the eighties it is not mention because you are face to face talking with your accent doing the gestures with your hands that are not local so it is not that necessary to remind others that you're an alien. What people knew about Brazil was the horrors of some few headlines.
When I feel an alien in my own country I blame it on my agenda.
Guess it's hard to feel home when one has lots of concerns and cares too much.
The most strange is that I would not feel comfortable having a blog in my own language but I'll spare you the details.


Delsiolive said...

That kind of weird sensation I endure myself and even far away of your political position I always express inner feelings in english, maybe because of the audience or, better, the wrong perception that people who surroundes me does not know english a bit! eheheh.
Great post!

Ana said...

Of course you are the friend I met in 2005.
I express inner feelings better in my therapy but I don't do it any longer... lol
I still don't know why I don't want to have a blog in Portuguese and I have already tried once, you saw it, but I don't even remember why I stopped.
I'll try to express it in another comment.
Just woke up... zzzzzzzZzzzzzz

Delsiolive said...

I was pretty sure that you mention our internet friendship, all your kindness is to blame!
Language seems to be irrelevant sometimes to express a mood , a feeling. Google translation is becoming ubiquitous that i can understand estonian! Ehehe..
Sure we can appreciate the beauty of language when someone has stlyle and mastery of it. I can endure with pleasure these readings and simple ones, clean e right speeches.

XXX :o)

Ana said...

Yes, sure the friend I met in 2005 is you. I'm not sure if it was 2005 or 2004.
Dear Lord! It's been a long time!
I'm amazed that Google translation is capable of being a good tool.
The reason I like to write in English is because I'm only concerned in expressing what I have to convey.
My English is very poor in writing and sometimes I wish I could right better.
But when I write in Portuguese I have the academical jargon and even when I speak I use some words that I don't like.
I hate the academical jargon or using some words.
But I cannot help it.
When I was at college I already didn't like it and I never used those verbs and words that are usual.
But I did read a lot, literature and theory... it is under my skin.
I'm totally free in English.
Sometimes I look to what I wrote and think that it looks like a 19 years old writing.
It is strange but nice at the same time.
I was writing something at SUIPA at Orkut and... my father is a prosecutor and he writes very well. I think it was him who influenced my writing and one day when I first publish a review in Jornal do Brasil he did some changes. It was the only time he taught me but I believe that in silence he told me all my life that he wanted me to write well.
I don't know.

Delsiolive said...

Yes, you do write in a good flow! Sometimes equalizes Susan's writing...and she is a pro! :o)

That's is a treat for inner ear, because I heard your voice. And a writer or journalist wich has a bad speech should be a silent one, because reading them can turn out to be dreadful!

So you ad your empathetic voice to all your writings to me.

So if it pleases you to write only english....GOOD FOR ANGLOPHONIC FELLAS!